Has your world ever completely turn over so that just about everything that you know could be ripped from you. From your arms, comfort, where you live, your job, even the possibility of losing beloved animals? Well this is my world right now.
I remember something I heard years before, when I have had other times like this.
The saying goes like this:
“If you had your hands full and someone was going to give you a gift, you would therefore need to put the stuff in your hands down in order to accept that gift.”
I understand that this is what might be happening to me. However the unknown is so very scary. I also read that during this time, it is really important to keep your thoughts positive, another extremely hard thing to do.
Looking back at what I have done in my life, or over the last months I should say. I wondered if there was a reason why all this is happening. I though maybe I did something wrong. I was unkind in some way, that my actions, thoughts, or maybe my own stupidity was causing this. I can say that over the past months I have been diligent, working hard to accomplish my wishes. I have battled my demons for control over my emotions and my fears. (Mostly regarding my writing fears and finishing my book). I have made good decisions.
I know that my situation was/is overwhelming before all this started. I had prepared for one thing, such as being able to pay for the shelter I live in, however since losing a valued position, I had to scale way down and now I am just floating. I have been trying to write, but had some changes with my computer. (A nasty virus, which I think may still be there, or something else is wrong with it.) Which is causing stress in me, because I need to get the story out of my head, and because I use writing to deal with that and other stress.
Okay I could go into a frenzy here. Breathe. Breathe, again. Yes that’s better.
All I can do now is wait and try to prepare for what’s to come.
One good thing happened this last weekend. I went to a grocery store called Trader Joe's. I was at the checkout counter and the cashier, Paul, was helping me. When he stated the amount owed. I was under, I thought I had more money with me, Oh well, I started to take things out to put back and he said,
“Don’t worry. You can get it next time.” and he waved for me to stop.
“Really” I said unbelieving.
“Of course.” He reiterated matter of fact. It turns out he was the store manager.
"WOW" I am going there tonight to cover the amount I was short which was only a little above three dollars, but since the man was so sweet as to allow me to keep the groceries, how can I not address this. I am only too happy to do so, and of course see the kind man again, bless him.
Thank goodness for writing to get stress and emotions out, instead of screaming, ranting, raving and cursing. I am so blessed in that respect.
If you have a story you would like to share, to get out your frustrations. Or to add some insight that would benefit other women, please feel free to add your comments. Your experiences may just help or save another. One never knows. Bond with us, share and have fun. Thanks ladies. You are the best.
